Hi, I’m Ilia Jones, Licensed Professional Counselor in Suwanee, Georgia, and I want to share a quick therapy trick with you called “Says who?”.
When you notice a harsh or critical thought in your mind, like “I’m a failure,” “I’m a terrible parent,” or “No one really likes me,” pause and ask yourself, “Says who?”. This question helps you challenge where that message came from and whether it is actually true.
Sometimes those critical statements come from things people said to us in childhood, from cultural messages, or from our own anxiety, not from objective reality. When you ask “Says who?”, you can start to separate your own values and beliefs from old tapes that are still playing in your head.
After you ask “Says who?”, try to replace the original thought with something more balanced and compassionate, such as “I made a mistake, but that doesn’t make me a failure,” or “I am learning and doing the best I can.” Practicing this over time can weaken the power of negative self‑talk and help you relate to yourself in a kinder way.
